Dr. Mom is Tracy's New Doctor

Dr. Mom Opens New Clinic At Tracy Hospital

They call her "Dr. Mom".  Delores Syverson has been associated with the Tracy Hospital for a number of years now.  But she has recently taken on a new role.

Supervising the Housekeeping and Laundry at the hospital just didn't satsify anymore.  She decided that she wanted to be a doctor.  Truth is that she has been treating patients with her special "Clean-o-pathic" medication for some time.  She had long been developing secret mixtures that she would add to her cleaning products as she cleaned patients rooms at the hospital.  She discovered that by combining cleaning products with her secret recipes she would see patients recover quicker than they would under normal circumstances.  She thought, "If just the aroma from my special Zipadeedoodah Cleaning Solution has such a beneficial effect what would happen if patients could take the product orally or even through an IV? Early tests of the product were ineffective when the product was taken orally.

Dr. Mom adds secret ingredients to her Zipadeedoodah Cleaning Solution / Medication

Dr. Mom adds another secret ingredient.

Then Dr. Mom came across a secret ingredient that she hadn't thought of before, St. Theodore's Basilica Gel.  She had heard of its miracle properties before, but how would the substance react with her special Zipdeedoodah Cleaning Solution? The first batch was a little too strong and had serious side effects not limited to dry mouth, dementia, and an unusual craving for Lutefisk.  Most who took the substance orally also experienced cramping and felt an unusual desire to play Jingle Bells on the Tuba.  They also tended toward a paranoid sense that everything that was going on around them was a crisis.  Some of those involved in the testing also were heard to sing "deep in my heart there's a gladness", but each time they got to gladness, they would burp.

This just wouldn't do. So Dr. Mom started adding other substances to find just the right combination.  It was determined that a large can of Campbell's Tomato  Soup was the perfect counterbalance to the side effects.

Further testing has determined that the special Zipadeedoodah Cleaning Solution will cure just about anything and Dr. Mom is now setting up a special clinic at the Tracy Hospital to administer the miracle medicine herself.
 

Late Breaking News:

Hard Times Crisis Management Seminar Cancelled this Week.

In an related story.  Roy Syverson was unable to hold his weekely crisis Management Seminars at Hard TImes Farms Inc.  He has been experiencing unusual symptoms including dry mouth, dementia, and an unusual craving for Lutefisk.  He has also been experiencing cramping and has felt an unusual desire to play Jingle Bells on the Tuba which has brought on a sense of depression since he no longer has a tuba to play. He was also heard singing "deep in my heart there's a gladness", but each time he got to gladness, he would burp.   The symptoms seemed similar to the side effects of Dr. Mom's early experiments.  However Roys's sense of paranoia regarding the crises all around him did not appear to be heightened above the normal level.   Send get well cards to: Roy Syverson